
Help Me Do It Myself – It’s the motto of the Montessori method of parenting, which I first heard about recently. A few months ago I “accidentally” met the Montessori method. I spent a month intensively in Montessori Kindergarten, where I learned a lot about Montessori in a little while. I also read Maria Montessori’s book – “The Absorbent Mind”, the originator of this story. In addition to this book, I have gone over several modules, dealing with Montessori philosophy, the story of Dr. Maria Montessori, the principles of work and some conclusions reached after so many years of developing this method. Montessori – Help Me Do It Myself!
The Montessori Method is Different Than The Normal Method Of Education
At first glance, this method does not seem to be much different from the standard, common to all of us. But only at first glance. It is so different, that it immediately won me over. I thought my kids were too big to work with them under the Montessori program because the first three years of life were crucial. But for some segments it’s never too late, even for my big kid who is 17 and especially for the younger one and he is 7 years old.
In a short time, they started adopting some great new ways of upbringing and parenting, that I was delighted with. I was smiling so many times over the past few months, only from the sidelines, at their progress (and mine, to be honest) as well as the changes… But many times I wondered what it would be like if I knew all of that before.
I’ll try to state in this text, at least briefly, all the most important methods and what can help us as parents, especially single parents, in the long run. If you want to learn more besides this, go ahead! I realized that with this method, the strong ones are perfected and the weak ones strengthened. And that was necessary for me and my children. To strengthen daily and improve on our new path.
What Is Montessori And What Are We Doing Wrong?
Let me try to explain the essence to you. Montessori pedagogy is based on a child development philosophy with self-activity, individual pace and a unique approach. The emphasis is not on teaching, but on encouraging the child to manifest an innate potential and to develop naturally. For this to happen, the child needs to be motivated to self-build, to create his or her relationship to the environment, not to be restrained, or rather, to feel free.
Maria Montessori emphasized that each child has his or her own unique development characteristics. She felt that just following child’s inner motivation, we should encourage and observe them. She said that the child does not develop by learning words, but by gaining experience. And the education system, and we, as parents are intensively denying that experience to our children, under different excuses. Most often that’s a lack of time, a big hurry, our desire to do things for our children only out of love, thinking that they cannot do it themselves, etc.
Very often, the excuse is that the child doesn’t know how to do something himself, for an example, he can’t eat without staining the couch. When I say lack of time, I mean, first of all, dressing, shoes, tying shoes, preparing things for kindergarten, school, preparing a snack, looking at the clock. I know that we have all done this or are doing our best to help our children, but this kind of help only hurts them in the long run.
How To Help Both Myself And My Child With Montessori
On the other hand, all that we do not have time for, and very often patience too, and what seems the hard way, is a long-term and multifaceted help to our children. Unfortunately I didn’t know this before. But you can also tell your child, even without expensive Montessori kindergartens or schools, you can afford an education that will change both you and your child.
How? Simply. Let the child from day one, and especially until age 3, do everything he can. Everything. Allow him to get dirty, to try, to do whatever he wants. Don’t do things for him, but help him do it himself! Bring him closer to the adult world in all available ways. Surround him with practical subjects, mathematical materials, nature, foreign words, allow him to gain experience.
And each parent will quickly understand what the child wants, can, and knows by following the child. It will be hard work for a few years, but later, it will bring so many benefits that you will be proud of, for your child as well as yourself. Children need human dignity, respect and free development, which many parents and classical psychologists do not see, and Montessori pedagogy emphasizes.
When Asked If A Child Needs Adult Help Or Not, Maria Montessori Replies – Help Me Do It Myself!
She emphasized that learning should be turned into a game and that the child should be accessible to the entire adult world in miniature form only. If these geographical and financial Montessori kindergartens and schools are accessible, then this is where miracles become possible.
And these miracles later turn children into adaptable adults, ready to cope with new situations. If not, then do everything you can. I would add here that it is not enough for a child to let Montessori educators and continue to act at home the same as before. On the contrary, it is only by joining forces that something can be done.
Dr. Maria Montessori
Maria Montessori, founder of one of the world’s most interesting teaching methods, was the first doctoral student in Italy. Not only that, she studied psychology, philosophy and anthropology in addition to medicine. She gained her status only through her perseverance, hard work and dedication. At the shift of centuries, this woman was a miracle!
And marvelously she showed who she was and how much she was worth. She worked observing children and applying knowledge from the sciences she studied. Only today does modern research confirm her observations and discoveries. But the world is still far from the change we need. At least I think it is, but I pray that if one day it comes, it will be just as it should be. We should not allow ourselves to be twisted and misused …
The books she wrote, didactic accessories and materials, as well as her insights, greatly influenced the development of pedagogy throughout the world. So it’s not surprising that her work still attracts the attention of parents, educators, teachers, psychologists, educators, doctors, defectologists – just like it was 100 years ago when Maria Montessori’s first orphanage was founded.
Maria Montessori – “I observed and studied the children, I took from them what they gave me, I received and expressed it. This is what is called the Montessori method.
Principles Of Labor
The first thing I remembered and what I would like to convey further, as far as principles are concerned, is that it is most important to start working with children in their earliest childhood, as it is considered to play a very important role in developing balanced, enterprising and competent behavior. It is thought that working from an early age is the best way to develop the brain.
Respect for the child, his freedom of self-expression, sense development and movement are also considered to be important. Children are not praised for the results they have achieved, but their inner satisfaction with the achievement is encouraged. The rhythm of every child in adopting knowledge is respected, whether they are above-average intelligent children or children with special needs. Children are accustomed to help the younger ones, learn from older students, and learn to respect each other’s differences regardless of their background.
Materials And Space In Montessori
Materials and space for work and life of our children are very important. Teacher shows the children using the so-called “Basic lessons” how particular materials are used. After that, children work with these materials according to their interest and pace. The materials are carefully selected, made of natural materials and colors. This is how children learn through playing about everything. The materials are housed in a space accessible to kids with miniature furniture and open shelves, making one small world big. In this world, a child can do anything.
The materials are: for practical life, sensory, linguistic, mathematical, geographical, botanical, musical. They are neatly stacked in a custom space, accessible to children at all times. There is only one copy of each material. Children are taught to wait their turn, be tolerant, and communicate. The obligation is to return the material neatly to the same place after use. Also, silence is a very important factor in working with this method. Peace is considered necessary for children to be able to concentrate and be unbothered.
Phases of the so-called sensitivity – Or the Ability to Adopt Individual Skills
Order sensitivity – represents the child’s need for consistency and familiarity, so that the child can be more easily orientated. It has been proven that a child between the ages of 1 and 3 is disturbed by change and wants things to be where they were before.
Language sensitivity – Listening to human speech, a child absorbs language from birth to 6 years without any training, with basic structures, grammar and accents. That is why one should talk to the child, it develops his speech and enriches the language.
Sensitivity to movement – the child walks, runs, moves, and that way perfects his movement. If we follow his rhythm, the child can walk for miles, and the adult does not have to carry him.
Sensitivity to social behavior – at two and a half years old, a child shows great interest in other children, plays with them and becomes part of a group.
Sensitivity for small objects – A child between the ages of 1 and 2 is attracted to small objects. He takes them in his hands, watches them (maybe puts them in his mouth) and so he gets to know the world.
Sensory development sensitivity – Your child will develop their senses the best if they explore the environment, and live with adults.
When asked what to give her child to do alone, Maria Montessori said – all he can do! We often do our best to prevent the development of the child. According to the Montessori method, we need to allow the child to work alone. That way he will learn about the world and build confidence. This should be enough for us to do a great deal for our own and children’s well being, without anyone’s help.
Let’s Grow!
I think we are not even aware of the magnitude of this philosophy and what the application of its methods would bring to the world. The world would never be the same again. Children would not have resistance to a world where they need to feel kinship and belonging. And to develop and grow happily. When I say growth, I mean all of the most wonderful qualities that come from love for learning and development, and the same kind of environment in which it grows. In all possible ways. Maybe this could also help us build a much better and different world tomorrow …
P. S.
Today, I am ashamed of myself when I just remember all the things I did for my children instead of letting them do it themselves. And it happened in moments when they could certainly do it all on their own. If you you’re in the same situation, do it this way and don’t make the same mistake. Although, I’m glad to admit, there were many things that were not wrong.
I am sorry that our education system is far from real life. Although we are doing good compared to some less developed countries in the world.
Soon I’ll bring you the most important Maria Montessori rules that each of us should know to be a better parent.
GOOD LUCK!
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