Find your way, don‘t give up…
For Christmas, with all my heart, I want what I have wanted for myself too, to find your way, no matter how difficult. I want you to remember the power of love and your own power that you carry. Long before the divorce, I thought I had found my way. And then at the age of 43, I realized that this path was not mine and that I had to start over. I was tired and confused and didn’t know how. What about when you feel like a whole world has collapsed? There was nothing left of what I wanted for myself. I couldn’t breathe normally, and I needed to gather strength and trust. (For Christmas) I Want You To Find Your Way
Find Your Way-How To Know What Will Be Tomorrow?
How do you even know that what is in front of you tomorrow is the right and exactly your way … One thing is for sure, you cannot know, but you mustn’t stop. Christmas is the right time to find your way. You have to start building from the beginning, with faith in yourself, dice by dice, step by step and day by day. It was most important for me to reconcile with myself, to forgive myself for everything and then to slowly search for my way again. It wasn’t easy, not even today … And the added burden was that the traces of the past and the difficult divorce were constantly reminding me of how difficult the past was to leave behind.
Building anything all over again is hard work, especially when you have to do it yourself. Or when the ghosts of the past follow you in stride. One of the very important facts that I learned only after my divorce is that this construction has no end and that the purpose is to make every day work. Even when it’s far from it.
The First Step Is The Path To Your Own Pure Heart
Building any path with your heart closed, and especially a new life path, is difficult, maybe even impossible. I can confirm this with my example. At some point, you think that your tight, stiff heart is the best defense against being hurt in the future, and that is, in fact, the biggest mistake. Because it’s impossible to build a happy, soft and rich new life if you have a heart of stone. A quiet, soft and generous life is what we want, what we hope for, and certainly what we deserve. And Christmas is the easiest time to start over. There is so much love, ceremony, and grandeur in this holiday that somehow all the weights get lighter.
That is why our wounded heart is our first stop. It’s obliged because we need to find ourselves there again. The heart should be cleansed, softened, opened, love found.
It is only when we complete this task that the construction of a new path becomes easier. And only when we cease to persuade others, to justify ourselves, to explain, to criticize, to persecute, to blame, to complain, to cry, or to realize the power of forgiveness … Over time, it becomes quite natural for us to regularly meet with ourselves. I like to compare it with tooth brushing or showering. And then we will feel again what it is worth living and what it was worth giving birth to. Love.
Even in the greatest troubles, sorrows and current nonsense, the way out is just that. And salvation. Like the fact that we gave our best to ourselves and the people around us.
Expel Fear, Embrace Faith And Peace
A major obstacle to our new path is fear, powerlessness. Will I be able to? How will I? Will everything be alright? I remember dying of fear. So much so that I felt sick. Somehow I started to get scared of life. What brings a new day. I was afraid I would fail. That I won’t be able to. That everything will go to hell. I started to take life too seriously.
And then I started thinking intensely about life, reading more than ever, and choosing what I read. I remember one sentence about the meaning of life that says – The meaning of life is to give meaning to life! I don’t think I will overstate saying that this sentence woke me up, maybe saved me. So if I have to make sense of my life, what am I waiting for ?! What am I afraid of, why don’t I do it? Why do I neglect the power I have and where my faith has disappeared?
And so I began slowly, reading, believing, repeating this sentence daily like a parrot. My actions got bolder, and I got braver. And nothing happened overnight. But restlessness was slowly becoming peaceful. Fear faded. And I spent more and more time dealing with myself. It was already easier to find your way back then…
Find Your Way-Dealing With Yourself Is Important
Many people think it’s a waste of time, and it’s too selfish. It’s not at all. It’s not as if you’ve neglected everything around you, your children are hungry, your house is dirty, you are not fulfilling your obligations, you have become negligent or you have stopped living in that search for your way. The opposite is true. Well, life is the way to go. The path of all the best for yourself and everything around you. The best path. And everyone is looking for it or they should be looking for it.
I pray that we understand how important that is. How important it is to take care of yourself and start from yourself! And then, who knows, our crumb can become a lump, it can again grow into a boulder and so … Not only will we build our new path and life, but everything can have a much higher meaning. Because we are more than we seem to be! It is a shame that we often forget that.
That’s why, to you, who still didn’t, I want you to find your way this Christmas, yourself in your own heart, and to put away fear at all costs. Let love and peace guide you. And be sure to deal with yourself.
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